what if you scrolled past one of those posts that said “like if you love god, scroll down if you love satan” and then a day later you get a call and you pick up the phone and a gruff voice on the other end goes “i heard that you loved me and i just want to say that no one has ever loved me before” and then you guys go on a date and eventually get married and you become queen of hell.
a dream come true
sleeping naked is very dangerous bc if someone breaks into your house at night it would be very embarrassing to fight him off while naked
A detail shot ^^
- Greed: I want shit
- Envy: I want your shit
- Wrath: I'm going to wreck your shit
- Lust: I'm into some freaky shit
- Gluttony: This is some tasty shit
- Sloth: I don't feel like doing shit
- Pride: I am the shit
Bob the Maid
I AM SO FUCKING MAD. I AM SO FUCKINFG MAD. NO MATTER WHAT I GODDAMN DO THERE IS NO WAY I CAN GET THIS ABOMINATION OFF MY DASH. THERE IS NO WAY I CAN REMOVE THIS BLEMISH ON THE FACE OF HUMANITY FROM MY SIGHT. I DONT WANT TO FUCKING SEE SOME SENTIENT PIECE OF CORN SHAKE ITS ASS DRESSED IN A GODDAMN MAID SUIT. HOLY SHIT I AM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW, AT THIS VERY MICROSECOND. I COULD WIN THE LOTTERY AND I COULD SEE THIS FUCKING GIF AND MY LIFE WOULD BE RUINED. I WOULD SWIM ACROSS THE FUCKING ATLANTIC OCEAN AND CLIMB MOUNT EVEREST JUST TO GET THIS ACTUAL PIECE OF EXCREMENT OFF OF MY DASH. GODDAMMIT I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY I AM LITERALLY GOING TO EXPLODE INTO A MILLION TINY MICROSCOPIC PIECES. GET SOMEONE TO GATHER ALL OF THE PIECES AND PUT ME TOGETHER, AND ANNIHILATE THIS DISGRACE TO MANKIND.
Are we ever even taught how to play rock paper scissors or are we just born with the ability to do so?
[puts on red lipstick] [cracks knuckles] time to ruin some boys lives